Enneagram 4: The Individualist
This episode we are discussing FOURs. Fours are the romantics and they feel so deeply.
Fours want to uniquely be themselves around others. They also march to the beat of their own drum. Fours want to be loved deeply and they love deeply. They love to sit in their feelings. They get energy from sitting in their sadness and feeling the feelings. Their desire is to be special and unique. Fours value uniqueness and authenticity. Fours fear that having no identify or personal significance.
Fours are the creative type. They have a rich imagination and fantasy life. Four have the fear that they will have no identity or personal significance. Fours see art and beauty in everything and often look at unique pieces and make them their own. Fours enjoy wearing clothes that set them apart and make them different. They may spend hours picking the perfect outfit that is supposed to look thrown together. Fours search for authenticity and that means everything to them. Fours can spot fake people from miles away.
Fours feel like something essential and important is missing from their life but they’re not sure what it is and they are always looking for it. They look at other people and envy the normalcy. Fours are never really satisfied and are constantly envying others traits. They are always looking at what is unavailable to them. As fours continue to be in their healthy traits, they begin to let go of the envy of others.
When a four is in their sadness they can easily and quickly flip to melodrama. Fours are known to be ultra dramatic. What you see is never what you get due to the constant flip flop of their moods. Fours have so many layers and their waters run deep and truly want to be seen.
Fours don’t have feelings, they ARE feelings. They have super sized feelings. They feel everything at a deep level. Sometimes fours can feel unstable because they cling to their feelings so tightly.
Fours are often known as high maintenance friends and partners. This makes sense since fours are constantly in their feelings. The friends and partners of fours need to let fours have their feelings because asking a four about their feelings is very overwhelming to the four.
The wings for a four are three or fives.
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